Colliding Galaxies

It’s been over two years since I first gushed in ‘Crush before Kiss’.   I’ve been trying since to create a novelization of it, but I’ll admit- it was pretty poorly written, so it’s taking a lot of work!   Despite that, I still love the process and going back to my life in 2009.  It’s an incredible learning tool, as some say, “The child is father to the man.”  I hope as I age, I remember the things that could be accused as being ‘naïve’.    *Remember, the goal’s to avoid becoming a disappointed and bitter romantic.   

Now, I'm working through other things.  We've been bickering a lot lately.   (Or what seems like bickering.)  Our friend B. said her husband and her fought like cats and dogs for seven years at the beginning of their marriage. Marriage is colliding galaxies.  For me, it's periods of pushing and pulling, falling above and below one another, merging.  Being self-absorbed is no longer an option, it’s about learning how to surrender and trust.  In CBK, I had to get over being commitment phobic.  Today, the love I share with C. is about maintaining everything we’ve established.  It sounds easy, but this is what breaks people.  It means never letting off. (See: dieting, exercising, gardening, etc.)   The stars in our galaxies seem to be made from the most reflective material in the universe.  I find the closer he gets to me, the more I feel every bit of his happiness, disappointment, discovery, everything and how I react affects him deeply.

It seems there’s a lot to work against forces of defensiveness,  insecurity, and pride, but it’d be foolish to say it’d didn’t come from within ourselves. So, this maintaining's neverending, however completely worth it. 

Actually, it’s the only worth there is.

Welcome

Dear Reader,

I know what you’re thinking, “Another blog???” I know, I know.   It sucks that so many people have internet access and a keyboard these days!  It sucks that we all have something to say!  

I just can’t help myself.  I need a place to write between projects.  I feel like I have so much to say.  We came into this world screaming.  How can we just turn away from the many injustices, indignities, all the things that just piss you off?   I do admit I have to actively disconnect from the news because I get angry.  I get so enraged when I hear about religion shaping the government, homosexuals not granted equal civil rights, or Lady Gaga receiving 20 million hits on youtube while Christopher Hitchens lay dying in his Washington D.C. apartment and hardly anyone gives a shit!  It seems the world has become over-saturated and the only reactions one can evoke are from the sensational.  That bothers me.  

Actually, a lot of things bother me, but I know it's because I care. I do everything I can to not become negative or cynical, although I have been accused of that on many occasions, but I’m not.   Really.  Truly cynical and bitter people despise me because they can’t stand the fact that I actually believe things can be better.  I know I can't really change anyone else except myself and how everything affects me.  So, I won't stop caring. If and when I do, the worms will have at me- but never ever before then. 

So, follow me and the stuff that bothers me, comment generously and debate me if you feel the need.

You have a keyboard and internet access, don’t you?

For Man’s sake, engage!

_a.m